January 2025

5th

Snow arrived yesterday, Charlie took me out for a drive along the road to Ashkirk. As we ascended the bank of an unpopulated valley the road was not gritted, vision became limited, I saw little reason to continue in view of taking photographs for this post. I enjoy staying at the farm, my auditory hallucinations are quiet here because they are triggered environmentally; however anxiety manages to factor in cabin fever.

Sometimes I ask myself why I bother to update these pages, then I remind myself that is why I must update these pages. Ghostly memory of dejected person, lost somewhere about these here hills.

4th

Out and about collecting chaff today.

The dusty hopper was contaminated with rat droppings.

We used the sheep energy buckets for so many different things, here we are using the tubs as a measure. Charlie carefully mixes wheat with chaff, if the mixture is wrong it can kill the flock and also they have to be introduced to this diet slowly; once this resource has ran out, its £500 to find for ewe nuts.

Leaving I noticed a young coo with her head appearing through a broken brick wall, this, for a moment reminded me of the Shinning film "Here's Johnny!" scene.

2nd

A sunset walk alone the Ale Water in Ancrum.

This area of Ale water is often blustry cold .

Its took many years to look at photographs of myself.

1st

How pathetic they are, New years day, after fifteen years of zersetsung tactics , to smear serenade neighbours with a crud communist chant ; Stasi lives on whilst we die switched off .

The day was sopping wet, I faced off relentless rain to exercise a walk by a swollen Ale Water, my head noisy with audatory hallicinations that aren't recordable but could be recreated.

Happy New Year, EVERYONE .