January 2025

29th

This static website I've been developing is now online; I've been non-stop coding HTML for about a week to bring this static website online. My previous ghost powered website has been deleted; nobody was using comments and subscription etc so there was no need for it. To enable interactive feedback I plan to use Flarum, which I'll install on a subdomain soon.

28th

I visited the doctor's office this morning to consult a nurse; my cholesterol is approximately 600, which is higher than the average of 300. Because of my family history, the nurse suggested I take Statin drugs. I'd rather change my diet and lifestyle first, though; I have three months until my next blood test.

Tablet displaying a live video feed from a security camera inside a barn. Several sheep are resting in a pen filled with straw. The timestamp on the screen indicates the recording is from January 28, 2025. The location is identified as Woodburn PT Pen

We've started lambing, so last night Charlie moved a CCTV camera from the Farmhouse to the poly tunnel. Lamb TV is what we call watching mother ewes in the poly tunnel (on my iPad). Two years ago, we implemented IPCAMs to monitor lambing. This surveillance has allowed us to rescue a mother ewe that had fallen onto her back while in lamb.

27th

Sadly, our lambing season began when a mother ewe failed to push out her lamb, which had jumped into the world with only one trotter put forward. The lamb was effortless to extract from the mother ewe, even though she was unable to push it out.

Carcass of a small animal, possibly a lamb or goat, lying on a bed of hay. The scene appears to be outdoors, possibly in a barn or pen, with some debris and electrical wiring visible.

I felt unlucky, but Charlie informed me that this occurs at the beginning of lambing. Another mother ewe has already given birth prematurely. I am optimistic that things will improve for us, as we have only recently begun lambing. We had no control over any of these regrettable incidents. This evening, I participated in carpet bowls. Upon my arrival, one of the players abruptly exited the game, a behaviour that he had previously demonstrated two weeks ago upon his defeat. Is it the case that men, particularly Scottish men, are unable to tolerate losing to women? Is this the reason there is only one other female player at carpet bowls? The other player became furious with his balls after losing a set to me. I'm playing again, but I'll stop if things get worse; maybe it's tolerating this dystopia's biggest loser, me Léonie.

24th

It's awful outside, and Charlie has to go to work. The wind is howling around Woodburn Farmhouse and through Borthwick Valley. Charlie repeatedly mentioned that he would need to bring his small chainsaw to work to clear the path of fallen branches. Despite the double glazing and the chill caused by the wind blowing through the farmhouse, Sheepdog Sam is scared, but the Ewes in lamb seem unconcerned, chewing cud as if nothing were wrong. This is a typical British gesture, continuing to go about their daily lives despite the impending catastrophe.

Desk with a computer, tablet, and keyboard. A mug sits between the computer and the tablet. The computer displays a web page with text and a picture of a steam train in a landscape. The tablet shows a video screen capture. The overall scene suggests a workspace, perhaps for writing or content creation, possibly related to trains or travel based on the computer screen's content.

As for me, I'm seated in front of a Apple IMac desktop 2011 writing this diary; I'm contemplating lighting the fire, Charlie's gone to make morning coffee. I'm watching forensic psychology videos on YouTube with an iPad to my left; this helps reduce tinnitus but doesn't stop auditory hallucinations. I reply to these mostly negative messages with a hum of "yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh." Many years ago, when I was homeless and living on the streets of London (2010), I started having auditory hallucinations. At the time, people told me I thought too much.

Fire burning in a traditional fireplace. The fire is relatively small, with several pieces of wood burning within a metal grate. The fireplace itself appears old, with some visible damage or wear to the surrounding wall. The overall atmosphere is dark and somewhat dimly lit, focusing attention on the flickering flames.

My diary is being coded again from my ghost website. In May 2024, I decided to make my diary interactive by letting people comment and subscribe. I am returning to the task of coding a static website. To facilitate comments, feedback, and discussion, I am installing a separate Flarum forum.

Dark-coloured pickup truck carrying a large round bale of hay in its bed. The truck is parked on a wet, muddy driveway, with a small wooden structure visible in the lower right corner. A person is seated in the driver's seat of the truck. The background is a grassy hillside. The overall impression is of rural farm work.
Tri-coloured border collie-type dog's head and shoulders peeking out from under a green painted wooden table. The dog appears to be looking directly at the camera with a somewhat apprehensive or curious expression. The setting is a tiled floor, and part of an old wooden chair is visible.
Charlie relaxing on a leather couch with his border collie dog. Charlie is wearing a lime green high-visibility jacket and is holding a mug. The dog is nestled comfortably on his lap. The setting appears to be a living room. The overall feeling is one of quiet companionship and relaxation.

How does the wind damage a chimney like this?

Section of a rooftop with three chimneys and a television antenna. The chimneys vary in color and material, with one featuring a modern, metallic, H-shaped addition. The overall setting appears to be somewhat overcast.

Charlie returned from work with a bale of hay, smiling at me as he reversed his pickup toward the poly tunnel. He informed me that the chimney pot had been blown off the roof by the wind. I heard the wind impact the Farmhouse at midday, followed by a thud, which indicated that the chimney pot was the source of the noise. Must do some cleaning, health permitting.

22nd

A quiet afternoon at Woodburn Farmhouse.

Panoramic view of a rural scene. In the foreground is a grassy hillside, leading to a white farmhouse situated in a farmyard. Various farm implements and structures, including what appears to be a trailer and a large tarp, are visible in the yard. A low stone wall is partially visible in the background, and a misty or foggy landscape extends into the distance under a partly cloudy sky. The overall impression is one of a serene and somewhat isolated farm setting.
Panoramic view of a sheep shelter. A number of sheep are inside the structure, which appears to be a modified trailer or mobile shelter, filled with straw. The shelter is situated on a farm, with a farmhouse and outbuildings visible in the background. The overall impression is of a rural, agricultural setting.

Walked around the edge of the paddock.

Gently sloping grassy field under a pale sky. Several small, dark mounds of freshly turned earth are scattered across the grass, indicating the presence of burrowing animals, likely moles.
Gently sloping grassy field on a foggy day. Numerous molehills are visible across the field. In the far background, a building is barely visible through the fog. The overall mood is peaceful and somewhat misty.

I have observed that we are having issues with STASI moles.

21st

Today I'm having an endoscopy, which is why we had to rush back to Scotland yesterday. Apart from feeling overly bloated, my stomach pains are getting worse. It feels like something is moving around inside my cramped, sore stomach, gnawing on my intestines. It feels as though life is departing me, a suffocating sensation akin to being repeatedly struck in the stomach.

Close-up endoscopic photograph of the lower oesophagus. The photo shows an area of Barrett's epithelium (a type of abnormal cell growth) and a sliding hiatus hernia (a condition where part of the stomach pushes up through the diaphragm). The accompanying text provides the location (lower oesophagus), diagnosis (Barrett's epithelium and hiatus hernia), and the length of the hernia (4cm). The image is a medical diagnostic record, not an artistic expression. There is no creative background, emotional expression, or moral to interpret.

I'm so lucky to have Charlie drive me to the hosptial and watch out for me until the sedation wears off. The endscopy tube was much smaller and the sedation eased me into the proceedure fine. Additional to a diagnosis of Barrets Epithelium (Prague COM2) is a Hiatus Hernia sliding length of 4cm. Extracted four specimens biospy, a five week wait for results.

20th

Room 322 at the Forest of Arden hotel was unclean, with peeling wallpaper, a malfunctioning smart TV that would repeatedly reboot, a cigarette burn on the net curtain, dusty furniture, fusty pillows, and a dirty shower curtain. This old "4-star" hotel is in dire need of a renovation.

Wide-angle, low-perspective shot of a hotel room at night. The viewer's perspective is from the bed, with their legs visible in the foreground. The room features a television displaying a blue-toned image, a dressing table, and a seating area with a lamp. Clothing is strewn on a chair. The walls are adorned with three framed pictures. The overall mood is one of relaxation and quietude, suggesting Leonie and Charlie are enjoying some downtime in the hotel.

Charlie's father had once farmed the Forest of Arden golf course, but the Earl of Aylesford ended his lease to make room for the golf course. He was enthusiastic about the prospect of returning to his childhood family home, which had previously served as a hermitage. We travelled back to Bonnie, Scotland, after visiting Mount Saint Bernard's Abbey in Leicestershire, leaving Coventry.

Historical stone abbey set against a backdrop of a gently rolling, tree-covered landscape under a cloudy sky. The abbey itself is the main focus, showcasing its grey stone architecture, long, rectangular structure, and a prominent square tower. The architectural style suggests a medieval or perhaps early modern period. The roof is dark grey slate, and numerous arched windows are visible along the side of the building. The surrounding landscape is peaceful and relatively muted in colour, with a mix of deciduous trees appearing bare or winter-dormant in the foreground and a more distant, darker line of trees on the horizon. The sky is overcast, providing a soft, diffuse light. The overall mood is one of quiet contemplation and historical weight.
The Cistercians, officially the Order of Cistercians, are a Catholic religious order of monks and nuns that branched off from the Benedictines and follow the Rule of Saint Benedict, as well as the contributions of the highly influential Bernard of Clairvaux (venerated as Saint Bernard, was an abbot, mystic, co-founder of the Knights Templar), known as the Latin Rule.

I experienced a sense of security and tranquillity while wandering the countryside of this monastery, a far cry from the turbulent and troubled childhood I had in the village of Shepshed. Even though I was not raised by religious parents, I had minimal exposure to Catholicism, except for this monastery, which I regard as a sanctuary.

Panoramic view of the interior of an abbey. The architecture is Gothic Revival style, characterised by pointed arches, tall columns, and a long nave leading to an altar. Wooden pews are arranged facing the altar. A large wooden crucifix hangs near the ceiling. The overall atmosphere is serene and reverent, typical of a place of worship.
The Cistercian order dates back to the 12th century and the Trappists, in their origins a Cistercian reform, to the mid-17th century. Mount St Bernard is the only abbey belonging to this order in England.

We were greeted by Brother Martin, a friendly and informative monk, at the monastery shop. We purchased honey beer and furniture polish. The interior was impressive, that permeating a presence of stillness between exhaling and inhaling, an ascetic, between light and darkness, visually contrasting presence of life contained in-between tall upright walls.

Side view of a large stone abbey. The abbey is built of grey stone, with a tall square tower at one end. The style appears to be Gothic Revival. A smaller, adjacent building is partially visible in the background to the left. There's a simple paved area in front of the abbey, with a couple of benches and some landscaping. The sky is overcast. The overall impression is one of quiet dignity and historical significance.
Interior of an abbeys sanctuary. A statue of the Virgin Mary and Child is prominently displayed on a raised altar at the back. Below the statue, a large arched alcove contains a pair of wooden doors leading to another area within the church presumably a sacristy or chapel. Flanking this alcove are smaller, similarly arched recesses, each containing a wooden door, possibly leading to storage or smaller chapels. The floor is tiled, and wooden chairs are visible in the foreground. The overall architectural style is Gothic Revival, characterised by pointed arches and stained glass windows. The lighting focuses on the central statue, creating a contemplative and solemn atmosphere.
nave of an abbey, looking down its length towards the altar. The architecture is Gothic Revival, featuring high, pointed arches, tall columns, and a large, wooden crucifix hanging from the ceiling. The floor is tiled, and simple wooden benches are placed near the viewer. The overall feeling is one of quiet solemnity and grandeur.
Panoramic view of a calm reservoir. The water is dark brown and relatively still. The lake is bordered by bare, winter trees on both sides, creating a quiet, somewhat desolate atmosphere. A low stone wall, partially covered with dark material, is visible in the foreground, suggesting a dam or embankment. The sky is overcast and grey. The overall impression is one of a peaceful, natural scene in the winter season.
Blackbrook reservoir was constructed in 1796 in order to feed the Charnwood Forest Canal, which has long since vanished. The first dam constructed was an earthworks one, and this failed on 20 February 1799. In eleven minutes the reservoir was empty and as a result local farmland was ruined, sheep were drowned, and much of Shepshed and nearby Loughborough were affected by flood waters. The dam was repaired in 1801, but the canal was no longer commercially viable.

Following Carter Bar, we took the M1, A1, and then the A68 back to Roberton, stopping for coffee at Washington Services en route.

18th

I bought some bird food a few days ago, but today there was enough light to record them eating.

Cluster of snowdrops (Galanthus nivalis) growing in moss at the base of a rusty, old plow blade. The snowdrops are in various stages of bloom, with some flowers fully open and others still budding. The contrast between the delicate white flowers and the rough texture of the weathered metal creates a compelling visual juxtaposition, suggesting themes of resilience, renewal, and the passage of time. The scene evokes a sense of quiet beauty found in unexpected places, hinting at the persistent beauty of nature even amidst signs of decay and age.

We washed our truck in preparation for our journey to Coventry. While filming the birds, I assisted Charlie with his sheep; additional footage will be forthcoming.

16th

Today I'm writing this website while drinking Bourbon Whiskey and listening to Bluegrass music. The accompanying image depicts my desk, which I employ to develop this website. I use Gnome Builder to code, Gimp to edit photos, and Piviti to edit videos on my Dell Optiplex running Debian Linux.

Wooden desk with a computer setup. On the desk is a Dell computer monitor displaying a sunset landscape with the date December 2024, a keyboard, speakers, a bottle of Western Gold Straight Bourbon Whiskey, a glass of what appears to be whisky or similar beverage, a pair of sunglasses, and a pen. The overall ambience suggests a personal workspace or home office.

As the Cross Keys pub in Ancrum was closed, We travelled to Lilliesleaf. Also, the Plough pub in Lilliesleaf was closed, so we drove six miles to Melrose. Upon our departure from the Kings Arms, we discovered that the Ship pub was still open. Charlie proceeded to rack pool balls after ordering a pint of bitter and, for me, a slice of Guinness. Football displayed on a huge television set irritated me.

Charlie wearing a burgundy shirt, bending over a pool table. He is holding a pool cue and appears to be about to make a shot. The white cue ball is on the table, near Charlie. The setting appears to be a pub or bar, with a green pool table as the focal point. The background shows some dark wood panelling and geometric wallpaper. A portion of a television screen is visible in the upper right corner.

Drunk and disorderly is a public order offense that occurs when someone is drunk and behaves in a disruptive manner in public.
It's also known as public intoxication .

Google A.I generated description of "Drunk and Disorderly".

As a last resort, the ship was the pub, which makes me think of the Waverly Bar in Hawick, where crazy and disturbed people drink to deal with their personality disorders. Not that I'm crazy, disturbed, or don't have a personality disorder. The people who are there don't have a personality disorder; they're just getting over the memory of their partner's disorder.

15th

Sick tup lamb died tonight and is now waiting for the red and black bull van, driven by the knacker man, to come pick him up.

14th

Visiting the doctors because my edema symptoms have been getting worse. On our way back to Roberton, we saw a beautiful sunset as we flew over Chapel Hill.

Long, winding road stretching towards a vibrant sunset. The sky is awash in a breathtaking display of pink, orange, and red hues, creating a dramatic contrast against the dark silhouette of rolling hills and a line of trees in the midground. The road appears relatively empty, adding to the sense of tranquillity and vastness. The overall scene evokes a feeling of peace and the beauty of the natural world.

We have encountered some issues with the head and rear lights of our truck. Charlie relocated numerous lambs from the polytunnel, as the ewes are only two weeks away from lambing.

13th

Although no birds were observed throughout the day, I emerged victorious in carpet bowls with a series of nine games, resulting in a final score of 10-4.