January 2025

29th

This static website I've been developing is now online; I've been non-stop coding HTML for about a week to bring this static website online. My previous ghost powered website has been deleted; nobody was using comments and subscription etc so there was no need for it. To enable interactive feedback I plan to use Flarum, which I'll install on a subdomain soon.

28th

Been called into the doctors surgery to see a nurse this morning; I have high colestrol, about 600, the average is 300. Considering my family history the nurse requested I take Statin medication, but I'd rather altercate my diet and lifestyle first before such a measure is taken; I've got another three months before the next blood test.

Late last night Charlie moved a CCTV camera from the Farmhouse to the polytunnel, as we have now begun lambing. Monitoring mother ewes inside the polytunnel (on my iPad) is known to us as lamb TV. We started using IPCAMs to monitor lambing two years ago, this survelience has enabled us to save a in lamb mother ewe that had fallen onto her back.

27th

We started lambing season with tragedy, a mother ewe failed to push out her lamb, that had leaped into this world with only one trotter placed forward. Charlie said the lamb was easy to pull out of the mother ewe, despite her not being able to push her lamb out.

I felt unlucky, but Charlie says this thing happens at the beginning of lambing, another mother ewe has already had a premature birth; I hope things pick up for us as we have barely started lambing. Both of these unfortunate instances were just beyond our control. We played carpet bowls tonight, one of the players walked out after I arrived, he walked out two weeks ago also, after he lost a game to me. Another player got quite angry with his balls, again after loosing a set to me; do men, be it Scottish men, not tolerate losing to women, is this why there is only one other female player at carpet bowls? I'm playing again, but will stop if this situation worsens; perhaps it's tolerating this dystopia's ultimate loser, me Léonie.

24th

Server weather warning red and Charlie has to go into work; wind is howling around Woodburn farmhouse and roaring through Borthwick Valley. Last night, Charlie kept saying that he'd have to take his small chainsaw to work; to remove fallen branches obstructing the path. Despite double glazing, wind has blown chill through the farmhouse, Sheepdog Sam is frightened, but Ewes in lamb don't appear bothered, chewing cud as though nothing is happening, such a British thing to do, carry on as usual in face of imminent disaster.

As for me, I'm seated in front of a Apple IMac desktop 2011 writing this diary; I'm contemplating lighting the fire, Charlie's gone to make morning coffee. I have an iPad to the left of me, I'm watching forensic psychology videos on YouTube; this helps quieten none stop auditory hallucinations, I respond to these always negative messages with a hum of yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh. Auditory hallucinations began over a decade ago when I was terrorised when homeless on the streets of London (2010), at a time when people were saying I thought too much.

The diary is being coded again from my ghost website; in May 2024 I decided to make my diary interactive, allowing comment and subscription. Nobody utilised this, so I'm returning to code a static website, I am installing a separate flarum forum to allow comments, feedback and discussion. The motivation behind this diary was to share my life with a world that would not share life with me; so whether people read these pages doesn't hinder writing these pages, it matters that I shared this alienated life, through a medium that was possible.

How does the wind break a chimney like this?

Charlie returned from work with a bale of hay, smiling at me whilst he reversed his pickup toward the polytunnel; he told me that the wind had blown the chimmney pot from the roof. About midday I heard the wind slam down onto the Farmhouse, then a thud, so that must have been the chimmney pot. Really must do some cleaning, health permitting.

22nd

A quiet afternoon at Woodburn Farmhouse.

I walked the perimiter of the paddock.

And noticed we have a problem with STASI moles.

21st

Fasting, having an Endoscopy today, our reason for rushing back to Scotland yesterday. Stomach pains are becoming horrific, other than a being over bloated, the feeling is as if there is something moving about inside my cramped, sore stomach, chewing up my intestines. It's as though life is leaving me, a tiresome pain akin to being systematically punched in the gut.

I'm so lucky to have Charlie drive me to the hosptial and watch out for me until the sedation wears off. The endscopy tube was much smaller and the sedation eased me into the proceedure fine. Additional to a diagnosis of Barrets Epithelium (Prague COM2) is a Hiatus Hernia sliding length of 4cm. Extracted four specimens biospy, a five week wait for results.

Stress caused my stomach to boil out my oesophagus. Unfortunately, these diagnoses don't explain my stomach pain, which require further investigation into the bowel.

20th

We stayed at the Forest of Arden hotel; room 322 was grubby, peeling wallpaper, broken smart TV (kept rebooting), net curtain cigarette burn, dusty furniture, fusty pillows and dirty shower curtain; this tired "4 Star" hotel is in need of a refit. Charlie wanted to do a hotel review, in view of the room I was fearful to order / eat the hotel food; clientele were strange.

Part of the Forest of Arden golf course used to be farmed by Charlie's father; but, to allow the golf course, his lease was terminated by the Earl of Aylesford. Charlie was eager to revisit his childhood family home (used to function as a hermitage). Departing Coventry, in Leicestershire we visited Mount Saint Bernards abbey via our return journey to bonnie, Scotland.

I visited and dwelled about the countryside of this monastery, far removed from a troubled and turbulent childhood in the then village of Shepshed, I felt safe and at peace here at this monastery; even though I was not raised with religious parents, I had little if any contact with Catholicism other than this monastery that I viewed and still is a place of peace.

In the monastery shop we were welcomed by a friendly and informative monk named brother Martin, we purchased honey beer and furniture polish. The interior was impressive, that permeating a presence of stillness between exhalling and inhalling, an astectic, between light and darkness, visually contrasting presence of life contained inbetween tall upright walls.

In my life I've experienced many, many devils, but within the town of Shepshed I've observed Satan manifesting through many, many people, this parish has a significant problem with Resident Evil. Our brief appearance at Armstrong mill incurred Satanic stares; notably from a belching, burping elderly man backdropped by a lurid printed canvas picture of superman.

Oddly, it was my estranged brother who first noticed the presence of Satan in Shepshed public, but he called this out as the "Shepshed stare". To realise this, you only have to notice that almost every house has net curtains to deflect the Shepshed stare from entering their homes. Great evil was inflicted upon my childhood through this harbouring of Satan.

After being gone almost nine years since I was almost terrorised to death by a Facebook Spotting page (there was a police investigation and public hatred addressed at a parish council meeting), from living in Stroud, Truro and now the Scottish Borders, Shepshed's remorseless inflictions of utter evil were upon me again; within minutes of arriving back in Shepshed.

18th

We purchased bird food some days ago, but today there was enough light to film them feeding.

We washed our truck read for our trip to Coventry, inbetween filming the birds I helped Charlie with his sheep; more footage to come.

16th

Drinking Bourbon Whiskey this afternoon, listening to Bluegrass music whilst coding this website. Below is a picture of my desk I use to make this website. I have a Dell Optiplex running Debian Linux, I code with Gnome Builder, edit photographs with Gimp and videos with Piviti. At the farm I use

We travelled to Lilliesleaf has the Cross Keys pub in Ancrum was shut. The Plough pub in Lilliesleaf was also shut so we travelled six miles to Melrose. Missing last orders at the Kings Arms we found the Ship pub open, Charlie racked pool balls after ordering himself a pint of bitter and me a slice of Guinness. Football displayed on a huge television set annoyed me.

Drunk and disorderly is a public order offense that occurs when someone is drunk and behaves in a disruptive manner in public.
It's also known as public intoxication .

The Ship was a last resort, pub reminds me of the Waverly Bar in Hawick; where disturbed and deranged clientele medicate their personality disorders with alcohol; not that I'm deranged, disturbed and without a personality disorder. If clientele have no personality disorder they're at the pub to liquidate the memory of their partners personality disorder.

15th

Sick tup lamb died this evening, and now awaits to be collected by the red and black bull van, driven by the knacker man.

14th

Visited the doctors as I have been suffering from worsening symptoms of Edema, returning to Roberton we witnessed a wonderful sunset whilst travelling over Chapel Hill.

We've had some trouble with head and rear lights on our truck; Charlie moved several lambs out of the polytunnel as the ewes are only two weeks away from lambing.

13th

Rained all day, no birds came, however I won carpet bowls with one set of nine games, final score 10-4.

12th

Charlie fired the tractor and moved the topper to free up space to allow us to build a lambing enclosure; our lambs are due within the next three weeks.

I set up my iPhone upon a tripod and captured the photograph below, this was triggered by my apple watch.

And a video clip.

Early afternoon we walked through the Craik forest.

We drove into Hawick, Charlie shopped, purchased bird food in B&M bargins, hopefully I'll get some interesting pictures tomorrow.

11th

In the morning Charlie unloaded a bale of hay of the sheep.

During the afternoon we fetched logs for our fire, chaff for our sheep and grit for our driveway.

I worry for Charlie, he has reduced capacity of judgement when it comes to lifting those heavy things; I help him wherever I am abled, however I'm holding the camera so rarely appear in these photographs. I used still images and short clips as I want to limit interference making this diary may have upon our day.

Journey returning to Roberton sure is pretty during the winter months.

Everyday is busy, even on days of rest were busy with domestic jobs.

10th

Recieved a visit from the vet, poor wee tup lamb has a problem with his immunity.

She injected him twice and recomended us to keep giving him glucose and vitamins.

Hope he lives.

9th

Today I took a picture along Ale Water with my Panasonic DC-FZ82 bridge camera.

Tonight I've returned to Woodburn as we have a sick tup lamb needing attention.

6th

Apple Watch green ring was requesting to be closed so I took exercise on the Farmhouse Paddock.

I attempted a time lapse video clip but the blustry wind knocked over the tripod, the dusk sky was stagnant anyhow.

At carpet bowls I won the first game but lost the set; one bowler described me as wreckless for repeatedly stepping on door latch. One of my bowls was removed twice; why do they play these pathetic teehee mind games?