April 2024

29th

It's a cold grey morning here in the Scottish Borders, I have an open log fire glowing behind me whilst I type this paragraph, the farmhouse is quiet, but my mind is dissociated thought noisy from years of trauma inflicted derealisation. I feel happy when Charlie is contented, experiencing genuine emotions was hazed by stormy emotional Borderline Personality Disorder. I am working to calm this disturbed mind to rest well with my physicality before I die; I don't want to take damage inflicted onto me where I am going. The room I am pictured in is one of two rooms that have yet to be decorated.

Charlie return home from a ten hour work day, and then struggled for one and half hours.

To bring the flock from the paddock into the poly tunnel, severe rain has been harsh on our lambs.

28th

Charlie got the tractor working after charging the battery, a trespassing intruder had come onto the farm and turned on the tractor ignition key on; Charlie is meticulous about things and noticed other mechanisms on this tractor were also interfered with. He attached the muck spreader and began ascent up the paddock embankment without further issues, after this muck spreader had been parked stationary for two years. Our friend surmised the wheels being ceased up, but Charlie had oiled the machine before putting the machine to rest.

Charlie fertilising the paddock with muck; his spreader is eighty years old.

During the early hours of the morning and later in the afternoon, I help our friend fix his broken computers. His laptop had a Linux OS upgrade, from Ubuntu Mate to Fedora, I also upscaled the hard drive to SSD, a change that sped up the laptop significantly. After replacing the hard drive, I found the laptop locked with a BIOS password, this was cracked by finding a BIOS password generator online and entering a system ID code. Our friend fixed his desktop after finding the power switch defective, I happily plied our guest with cups of tea. As dusk settled upon the Northern side of Borthwick Valley, we endeavoured to fix a CCTV camera to protect our yard. We've used an IPCam from the farm's poly tunnel as lambing has finished for our ewes. Charlie used a ladder to mount the CCTV onto a wood located underneath the roof gutter, this has allowed us a monitored 320 degree view of the farmhouse yard. Charlie said these scumbags usually burgle farmhouses to steal quad motorbikes; to burgle the livelihood of a hard-working farmer, and inevitably starve their livestock of food.

27th

Two badgers terrified our lambs early this morning, they're nothing to the monsters who frightened their encroachments into depriving me of life, but I checked on the welfare of these wee things anyhow, and they're OK this morning. I am nagging Charlie to erect the extra CCTV camera; I am going to email trespassing video clips directly to the police force. Early afternoon we drove to Denholm and then to Selkirk, at Denholm we hoof clipped and sprayed a lame sheep with violet. At Selkirk we rounded up the flock inside a run and wormed them for fluke parasite, Charlie also dagged four ewes with mucky bums; the hard stone in the run hurt his knees considerably, notably when a ewe kicked out at him.

On the way to Selkirk we noticed our front right tire was flat, Charlie pulled in a mile from Minto and pumped the tire up. Today I restrung my banjo, I've missed playing for five days, forlaying purchasing new strings; however this time I ordered two sets rather than one. I still have a phobia of numbers, including 27, when I was stalked whilst displaced destitute.

23rd

Early morning Charlie loaded three ewes and lambs into the trailer bound for Longtown Market. We enjoying a small breakfast before entering the ring to watch our ewes and lambs auctioned at £70-80 a life. Returning through Langholm we took rest at Ewes Water, I wandered and taking pictures of ducks before we departed to refuel our truck.

This afternoon I purchased a new pair of sunglasses, Charlie was shocked at the £100 price tag but that's not much considering my last pair of sunglasses I purchased cost £400. After seeing to the lambs at Selkirk grasskeep we travelled to a garden centre for seeds to grow food in our farmhouse kitchen garden. Along the way a huge oversized pickup truck dangerously overtook us as we were nearing St Boswells.

22nd

Today, a visit into Hawick. The woman in the wool shop was so rude, looked at me then began gossiping with her friend whilst I waited to purchase an item. I stood there for minutes, whilst they talked about this and that; only when I turned my back and began to walk away did I get "can I help you". I protested the rudeness to which the woman replied she was serving the customer, despite conversation being off-topic and her not visibly purchasing anything. I won't be returning to that establishment again, in the face of such ignorance, it is of no wonder Hawick doesn't have many shops, why potential customers, including myself, fuck that and shop online now.

The cade ewe lamb finally lambed and became a mother ewe today, we don't know the time of birth as the little black lamb was dry when we found her late afternoon. Most of the ewes and lambs that have not gone to grasskeep have been released onto the farmhouse paddock to graze on fresh grass. The lambs are playful in the open spaces which is some comfort to observe. During the evening I fetched my bridge camera and took close up pictures of the springtime flock. In the evening I broke a banjo string with my new wire cutters whilst I was attempting to trim the ends at the head.

21st

We entertained three friends at the farmhouse.

At dusk, I watched an awesome sunset from the verge of the paddock.

20th

Charlie is still humoured by the lambs reaction from me singing to them; I have a roaring open log fire located behind me whilst I update this website.

Cuteness of these Herdwick / Teeswater lambs that we put out onto the farmhouse paddock yesterday. We've enjoyed the milder weather this afternoon.

19th

Most of the lambs in the polytunnel have now weaned onto haylage. This morning I strimmed away the ending of snowdrops from the farmhouse front garden.

In the evening, noticing the soil had hardened, we released three mother ewes with their lambs onto the farmhouse paddock. We both enjoyed watching the lambs play.

16th

My Herdwick ewe lambed male and female twins last night; these wee Teeswater x Herdwick lambs are so cute.

Today Charlie drove to Selkirk to purchase a chain for his saw, the lambs looked well at grass keep.

Whilst Charlie fed coos at Denholm, I took a few pictures of birds within the farmyard.

13th

We're having trouble with one cade lamb that has seriously fallen behind, among other cade lambs he suffered stomach illness (from tainted powdered milk) the worst. We are worried he is going to slip from our grasp and not survive the weaning onto grass, he's taken hours and hours away, but we'll do what we can to keep him alive in this world.

I felt relieved to be away from my flat yesterday; uncomfortable near my hateful neighbours, their minds poisoned with repressive, partisan tolerances. People were in and out of the flat block, arriving at the flat opposite, laughing and smirking observing me leaving, fleecing us all hapless is such tee hee fun.

Birds suffered Communism more than any other creature, China, underneath dictator Mao Zedong, exterminated millions of sparrows (and other birds) by terrorising these defenseless birds out of the sky. Obviously botched collectivisation efforts never knew about permaculture; but nonetheless us British are scapegoat blamed for the orcastrated famine.

The rain relentless poured down, flowing over the window screen of our truck.

We loaded our two tup lambs and transported them to Selkirk grass keep; leaving the farmhouse, relentless rain poured down. The flock at Selkirk were pleased to see our truck, a couple of lambs looked slightly unwell, we figured this was due to heavy weather recently, but we'll be keeping a watch on them nonetheless. Charlie is suspicious, but I am not.