March 2026

2nd

This website has become neglected as I've become too busy with my YouTube channel; today I will attempt to fill in the gaps between dates. I'm still quite angry after visiting Forman Hall for their fundraising quiz night. After tolerating the usual jumped up snobs and phobic fearmongers (research their appalling social media posts on Facebook and X) the community quiz night ended with the host announcing, from several teams of four both the winning and the losing team. The host, after explaining his "long ago" connection to the valley through playing carpet bowls in the hall, serenaded the winning team with compliments, and the winning team members lapped it up to the surrounding applause, it just all felt so bizarre. Then, as the three losers (three not four in our team) it was our teams turn for everybody's attention. The host told this hall full of people that our answers were some of the worst he had ever seen, to a rapture of laughter, as a handful of sweets, the loser prize, was placed upon our table.

There is a belligerent contingent of people who believe themselves justified by inflicting profound inferiority and systematic ostracism, but I'll tell you I've experienced so much of that in my life. From 4 to 11 years old I endured a single parent mother raging with paranoid schizophrenia, and from 11 to 15 years old I endured 52 placements in governmental care. At school, I was ostracised as "freak" and "alien"; at home I was slashed with a knife, because my brother befriended and welcomed relentless, vindictive cruelty. Rootless and impoverished I experienced decades of "move on eyesore" vagrancy, this recent bout of social cleansing is minuscule compared to what I have historically endured. Just because I have become accustom to vile people attacking me as though I should never have existed doesn't mean it's OK; step ford husbands, step ford wives, showering me with stones, fuck your endless cruelties; I'm so much better off for not knowing you or your hard face, dystopian, self-image obessed community.

We attended the fund-raising event to support the hall, and not to be made a laughingstock "loser" spectacle; our third team member, who lives in the attached warden house, disappeared before the winners and losers were announced, she foresaw the spectacle coming. It's not that I'm a sore loser, I was more focused on socialising than competing but to be smeared as unintelligent and stupid to over accentuated cheers and clapping was a profoundly uncomfortable experience. If I had not respected the hall, if I had not consumed so much whisky, the night could have ended very differently. Considering this hall is where most of us, those who live within this isolated Borthwick valley meet up, that we should become socially slammed as "stupid" by people visiting the valley confirmed, at least to me, an ignorant and common placed misconception that rural people, those who work upon the land, are somehow stupid and fickle. Maybe within a town or city that would be tolerated, but a remote village?

From these experiences I have learned that immoral people won't mend the error of their ways, as they consider their evil justified, unless they are taught a retributive lesson. NAZIS were obessed with an ideology of social hygiene, deemed people unworthy of life. This is not poor me, this is get off my back, I've been hated enough.

1st

We travelled to Teviothead.

But found the Kirk closed.